The Wise Don't Have Problems
The Daily Stoic for June 25th. “The Wise Don’t Have Problems”.
“This is why we say that nothing happens to the wise person contrary to their expectations.”
—SENECA, ON TRANQUILITY OF MIND, 13.3b
Today’s stoic excerpt seems to me like the part of yesterday’s stoic I can agree with. Silence is golden. I have always considered myself one of those people who “talks first, then thinks”. That’s a terrible problem, trust me.
The Wise Don’t Have Problems
With time, I have learned that it’s more important to listen than speak. In fact, it can help you reach your goals or convince the other end better. This might seem counterintuitive. However, when we don’t listen to others, sometimes we are doing wrong assumptions about what they want, think, or feel. Maybe their positions are not that far from ours, or their ideas are not as different as we might think
Hence, being able to truly listen to what they have to say can help you realize that something that looked like a problem, in reality, is not.
Obviously, that’s not the solution to any problem, but it’s a convenient way of not adding more problems to the pile.
In fact, I am trying to do an interesting experiment lately. When I have the chance, I try to speak to people whose points of view are very different from my own. And then, I try to listen more and argue less. In a way, I try to dive through their way of seeing the world.
While many times I can’t really find points of agreement, sometimes I would find that my initial assumptions were wrong, and this person is not as different from me as I initially thought. Well, sometimes it’s easier said than done, but worth trying it.
Today’s Daily Stoic, “The Wise Don’t Have Problems”, discusses again the concept of silence as a way of listening to others’ opinions, instead of imposing our own. I think it’s a concept I can relate to, especially lately.